Death and survival are two things that a doctor encounters on a daily basis. But the situation that we saw in this pandemic was beyond what we could have imagined. We constantly saw patients slipping away from our hands like sand running through.
I would like to share an incident I experienced as a doctor which made me realize how helpless we were in face of the virus that caused havoc in our lives.
A 45-year-old man with no comorbidities who was vitally stable was admitted to the hospital because he tested positive for COVID-19. He was the father of one of our nurses. I checked on him and ascertained that he didn't need close supervision because he was quite stable. He was admitted for simple monitoring. He did fairly well till the second day of his admission. On the third day, his health suddenly deteriorated. We were in no position to help him further due to a dire lack of essential drugs and equipment. Unfortunately, he succumbed. During the second wave of COVID-19, this was a common occurrence. There was a shortage of drugs, equipment, and even hospital beds.
My mind was storming with endless questions:
Am I not qualified enough to help him?
Was this his destiny?
These questions shook my conscience. I had never felt so helpless. Standing there with me was a nurse who had just lost her father. And all I could do at that very moment was just stand beside her and feel the turbulence of the emotions she was going through.
The pandemic took its toll on each and every individual. One could see every staff member in the hospital try and try, but in the face of circumstances, we were helpless. From people losing their loved ones to businesses facing financial crises, humans have fought the virus, under-armed.
I believe the health workers had it the hardest, as we witnessed patients being taken away by death's slumber like never before. The war will continue till the victory is ours.
About the Author-
Dr. Pankaj Goyal is a Junior Resident at the Department of Surgery at Lata Mangeshkar Medical College and Hospital, Nagpur. He loves to play volleyball in his free time along with watching movies, surfing the internet, and gorging on delicious food.
The experience was dictated.